“To build out capacity to sustain the comfort of not knowing.”

This is a phrase used in the book “white fragility” which I’m reading and on page 14. But it also struck other things within me.

It makes me think of faith. My theology and relationship with Jesus. And how my discomfort with “not knowing“ causes me to turn my eyes away from him or even on the gifts he’s giving me right now. I’ve been sitting here feeling sad and sorry for myself as I read this book, on a beautiful patio on a beautiful summer’s day, because I am uncomfortable thinking that this may be my weekend experience for the rest of my life. And I’m finding myself feeling the grief of wishing I had someone, a partner, in my life who is the default presence in what I read, see, and. That’s part of why I started this micro blog. To capture my thoughts and learnings. Because I feel like there’s so piled up within me and I just want to share them.

Anyway, back to my book.